missingthekeep | [for Meredith]

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[for Meredith]

Let it not be said that Sean has no Christmas spirit. Granted, the only reason he's up on the roof in the first place, stringing lights stolen from some nearby trees along the edges of his bloody cabin, is because he needs the distraction, but the point here is that he's doing it at all. The fact that he's heading towards another major holiday without Maeve, one of many, many more to come, the memory of how hard last year had been, running into Moira and everything that entailed, Sean isn't so oblivious as to not realize this is really just about finding something to keep his thoughts from heading to any of the old dark places and he hasn't suddenly turned over some festive new leaf. Really, it's almost the opposite, like he's cheapening genuine appreciation for the season by faking it for all the wrong reasons, but he doesn't care. He's up there, he's got his lights, he's got his Christmas spirit, and he's distracted enough by the simple act of not falling off for all the confusing thoughts and worries that having a girlfriend from the future show up apparently bring to be miles away. It'd be nice if he didn't have to look so damned ridiculous while he's at it, but it's a small enough price to pay for peace of mind, however brief.

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It's not simply that he looks ridiculous. It's that it's point blank confusing. Meredith knows full well what he's doing up there, because there's really not a whole lot of options as to what anyone could be doing on their roof with a bunch of lights at this time of year, but that doesn't keep her from wondering why.

"You're decorating," she calls up as she approaches, sounding faintly disappointed. She's not really, but it's still a little bewildering. "You're... why are you on the roof?"

The list of people capable of improving Sean's mood, especially during this sorry excuse for a season, is a pretty short one indeed, but even with everything else mucking up his head, Meredith's still firmly near the top of it. She's also fortunately one of an even more select group that he's alright with seeing him like this. "What is this?" he calls back down, carefully turning a bit to watch her. "Some quiz where ye gimme the answer 'fore asking the question?"

"No," Meredith retorts, burying her hands in her pockets, "it's me being confused." Despite that, she grins, the weirdness of it starting to prove funny instead of just absurd. "I didn't take you for the decorating kind, that's all." But then, she and Cristina haven't been able to muster up enough Christmas or Hanukkah spirit between them to do anything with their house, except maybe to take down some of what the island stuck on it.

"That'd be 'cause ye know me," Sean says wryly, finishing up that particular side of the roof before looking around for a good place to climb back down. Maybe there was a time when he'd have gotten some kind of ironic kick out of this sort of thing, maybe even have looked forward to it, but that time's long since past. "I was jus' lookin' f'r somethin' ta keep me busy, I'd nae read too much into it, luv. Try nae t' hold it against me too much."

"I'll try," Meredith sighs, mock-dramatic. Whatever the goal, it doesn't keep her from admiring the view as he descends. In any case, there's nothing wrong with a little celebrating. It's only if he reaches Izzie levels that she really has to worry. "I was just making sure you hadn't been possessed and forced into holiday cheer. But if you really need something to keep you busy, I'm here now."

"'Round here, I s'pose that'd actually be a valid concern," Sean concedes with a flicker of a smirk as he eases off the edge of the roof and drops the rest of the way down, kicking up a bit of snow when he lands. "Ye are me favourite distraction, though, and Lord knows I need one. Obviously," he adds, making an incredulous face as he turns around to briefly regard his handiwork.

"Well, as long as I'm your favorite," Meredith says, grinning as she walks over and gives him a quick kiss. "And it does look very pretty. Should I ask why the need for distraction or should I just get to the distracting?" She's been doing her best to work on that whole communication thing, trying to learn from her old mistakes, though she forgets more often than she remembers. It's amazing how much she can find to talk about other than whatever she's feeling or thinking, especially here where one day's so much like the next.

"Well now, I guess that'd be up t'ye, would it nae?" Sean asks lightly, fully aware that it's something of a cop-out. It's at least better than his first impulse to just dodge the question entirely with some comment about how the lights aren't half so pretty as her or something to that effect. It's not as if it's anything so terrible as all that, just confusing, although in a lot of ways, that's almost worse. At least with the stuff that's just plain miserable, he knows where he stands.

Meredith raises her brow at him, head tipping to the side. It's hardly an answer. Her first instinct is always to avoid things, but it can't be so bad or she doubts he'd even leave her the option of asking. She came looking for distraction herself, but only from how bored she is, so she bites. "Okay," she says, still with a hint of a playful smile, hands in her pockets, "then tell me. But walk with me while you do, I don't wanna just stand around out here."

"Sounds like a fair trade-off t'me," Sean says easily and leans in for another quick kiss, just for good measure. Stuffing his hands in his jacket pockets, he sobers a little bit as he sets off next to her, still unsure as to whether the matter actually warrants it or not. Knowing him, he'd like to think he's making more out of all this than there really is, but he's not as sure of that as he'd like to be. Maybe a second opinion will help. "It's nothin' too rotten, anyhow, I'm jes' bein'... well, me. The season's nae a good one, is all. Holidays're rough. An' another one from home showed up, an' it's strange as all get out, an' I'm pretty sure the month's just out ta get me every year," he sighs, flashing her a brief, wry smile. It says something that, with her by his side now, he actually doesn't feel like he's doing all that badly.

Though she's always wishing for more people from home, selfish as even she has to acknowledge that is, it's different for Sean, Meredith gets that, and the holidays aren't ever easy. Even so, she smiles and shakes her head at him. "That's all?" she asks. "Every month of the year's out to get you. And you know, you can always just avoid those people. I would." Just because they know him in the future doesn't mean he's obligated to know them now, after all, and no matter how many people she misses, there's a list just as long of people she'd be content never to see again, never mind people she doesn't even know yet.

"True," Sean admits with a dry chuckle. "But this one in p'rticular seems nastier'n most. A few years runnin', now. An' I'm nae really sure I want ta be avoidin' her, even if I wasnae horrible at that sort o' thing." If he was smart about it, he'd probably realize that it would be better for the both of them if he did, but he can't help but wonder. It seems like she should be the one making the effort to avoid him, like it isn't fair of him to take the initiative on that sort of thing, as little sense as that makes. Just one more thing to wonder futilely about that he doesn't need.

"Oh, well, that's different." Meredith tucks a hand into the crook of his arm, at once comforting and faintly possessive. She's not worried that it's a woman, but there's a quick pang of panic -- she believes him, mostly, that she's the one he wants, that she's first in his thoughts, but that doesn't mean she ever wants to try her luck against Maeve -- which disappears almost as soon as it arrives. He wouldn't be half so calm in that situation. "And probably easier. This place is kind of small for that. So... you just keep your distance until you figure out if you want to or not. I don't know what to do about December's vendetta against you, though."

"I'd suggest lockin' ourselves inside someplace an' keepin' entertained 'til it passes, but this place doesnae care too much 'bout boundaries," says Sean, smirking slightly and absently leaning into her touch as he walks. "Ye're right, though, an' 'm sure whate'er this is'll all work itself out in th'end." He's pretty sure he still hasn't adequately gotten across just why this has got him feeling so out of sorts, but he's also not entirely sure of that himself, so it's something of a moot point. "She's- she an' I were... involved, in the time she's from. Fer a while at that, least from the sounds o' things. I jus' dinnae really ken what ta make o' that, ye know?"

Anything Meredith has to say regarding that first suggestion gets forgotten as she looks over at him, a little startled by that. She's still emphatically not jealous, she doesn't get jealous, but all the same, she wants to find out who this woman is, hunt her down and watch her like an idiot from across the room until she determines whether or not she's prettier or smarter or generally better than Meredith herself. "Involved," she echoes, then remembers to keep walking. "Seriously? But -- but that's her time, so... She told you that?"

"Nae exactly," Sean replies, frowning. "Jean did. I'd heard 'bout her before, months back. Small favours, I s'pose, 'cause can ye 'magine needin' the woman herself t'explain that one? As if it wasnae awkward enae as is." At least there's one point about the whole thing that's been made a little easier for them. It's hard to see how it counts for much, but it's still something.

"That... would suck," Meredith agrees. Absently leaning into him, she bites her lip, suddenly sorry for her. Just showing up in this place is bad enough without losing Sean as well. "I wouldn't want to be her right now. But... if I were... I wouldn't want you to avoid me either. But I would. It'd be complicated." And that's exactly why she hopes he'll just stay away from her, but this one isn't really up to her.

"Mm-hmm," Sean hums, nodding his assent. At least now he's got something of a second opinion that he values on the matter, for all the good it does him. "Which'd be the reason why I'm suddenly filled with the spirit o' the season. Or... part o' the reason anyhow."

"Fair enough." She wouldn't want to think about any of that either. There are questions Meredith wants to ask and she knows he doesn't have the answers, but then, that's nothing new. They've almost never got the answers, but she can at least try to help in the few ways she knows, stopping where she stands and turning to kiss him. "Better you than me," she adds, still leaning close. "I'd just fall off the roof if I tried to decorate."

"Since I've enae concerns wi'out that one addin' to 'em, I'd say ye're right," Sean says with a quiet chuckle, kissing her again before teasingly adding, "But hey, maybe if Cristina asks real nice, I'll do yer place, too." Because as much as she's helped him feel better about the obvious issues at play, Lord knows the ones he hasn't quite yet sussed out aren't going to be going away any time soon. He'll be wanting for things to do for a while yet.

Meredith laughs, shaking her head at the idea. "Right," she says, "'cause that's gonna happen." She's got the feeling Cristina's less than impressed with Sean as it is, but she's not sure Cristina's ever going to approve of her boyfriends as it is. So long as she's not outright attacking him yet or saying they can't make it, Meredith can live with that for now. "Real nice isn't something she's good at. But I could ask nice."

Sean makes a thoughtful sound in his throat at that, making like he's mulling it over for a few seconds before slyly asking, "Jus' how nice're we talkin', here? It's nae as if ye c'n jus' tell me ta jump and have me ask 'how high,' now." Oh, no, nothing of the sort.

"You take all the fun out of it," Meredith deadpans, slipping her arms up over his shoulders. She's almost too warm now in her coat, so close to him, but there are more pressing matters on her mind. "I can be pretty nice when I want to be. Although truthfully, I'm really not invested in the idea of decorations so much as I am in watching you put them up."

"Aye, 'm a real stick in the mud, I know't," Sean says, giving a put-upon sigh before he grins and ducks his head, a little self-conscious even as he lets his arms settle around her waist. "Ne'er figured ye fer the type ta find manual labour sexy, though. Might have ta remember that."

"Well, that," Meredith says, smirking, "and once it stops being weird, it's kind of funny. But sexy's in there, too." The entertainment value on both levels, she's sure, would be well worth Cristina's fussing about the outcome. She shrugs, pretending to consider her reasons. "It's about even."

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