Homeplot: I Loved Her First

[missingthekeep]

The second time that Sean sets out at the crack of dawn, it's with considerably more determination and with a far different attitude. The days since his breakdown certainly haven't been easy, but every day the pain grows a little duller, seems a little further away. He'll always miss Maeve fiercely, always regret so much about what happened to her, but he's got other things to live for now, and that's not anything he should feel guilty about. She took a piece of him with her when she died, but he's always been able to stand as his own man, and he's kept a piece of her with him, as well. He'll get by.

More important than his pain abating with the days, perhaps, is the fact that the days continue to pass with a stunning regularity. They rapidly turn into weeks, with Sean and Meredith still solidly back in the real world, not a beach or palm tree in sight. It's too good to be true, but even a healthy dose of skepticism can only go so far when a man's every sense other than his gut is telling him something's real. So when the day finally comes that he can no longer treat this as a mere temporary reprieve, he becomes a man on a mission. If this is real (even now, even as he commits himself to the idea, the almighty if remains important), the time to continue shirking his responsibilities has passed.

He doesn't like the idea of leaving Meredith alone while he runs off (all in the name of duty, as always, boyo), but taking her along with him as he tracks down his errant cousin just isn't an option. He needs to be smart about this, efficient and safe, and these aren't traits that he tends to possess when Meredith's involved. Besides, he's pretty sure that she likes it even less, so he can't complain. Instead, he just promises to return within the week and prays that she'll be safe on her own in the meantime. Anything can happen, and it usually does, but treating her like a china doll to be coddled and fussed over is no way to begin their life together. He has to trust that she can take care of herself, no matter how much the act of leaving hits way too close to issues he's still working his way through.

He finds Tom on his very first night out, tucked snugly away in one of his nicer hidey holes, a drab but spacious apartment in Galway, no doubt funded through all manner of dark dealings. There's a fight, of course, but it's mostly just a formality. Tom never questions how Sean found out about Terry, and he never bothers to pretend that he has any real claim to be raising her. Hell, maybe it's for her safety that the other man never goes all out in taking Sean to task for coming to take her away. Maybe he really does care for her. It doesn't matter. He's come to take his daughter home, to wipe all the crime and the alcohol and the hurt clean from her life before she even has to go through it all. There are complexities and tricky questions about the child in his arms and the woman he once knew who'll never exist now that he'll have to address eventually, but for the first time in either of their lives, he knows that he's doing what's right with regards to Theresa. Tom doesn't enter into it. Their mutual hatred was well-earned on both sides, and it's far too late to do anything about that.

He's back before even three days elapse, most of it due to his taking the roads a lot slower once he's no longer traveling alone. That's one promise kept. A good start, he thinks as he arrives home and heads inside with a small, squalling bundle in his arms. Now comes the hard part: everything else.

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[missingthekeep.livejournal.com]

Even though he was the one who put the date forward, it takes a few seconds for that to sink in, and he nods dumbly. When it hits him, though, it hits hard, and he'd suddenly grinning so wide that he feels his face might crack. "There it is, then," he says, unable to suppress a laugh that's loud enough to startle Theresa. "We're gettin' married."

[drownondryland]

Meredith reaches down to touch Theresa's arm, then turns to Sean, huffing out a laugh in turn. "We're getting married," she says. "We're really doing it." It's been the better part of a year since he mentioned it at all and now here they are. It almost doesn't make sense, except it makes perfect sense. "You ready for this?"

[missingthekeep.livejournal.com]

Sean thinks about that, but only for a second. It's taken them so long to both be on the same page for this, and now that they've made it, he's not about to waste any of it. "Absolutely," he says, kissing her soundly once he's sure that Theresa's settled back down. "Are ye?"

[drownondryland]

It takes a moment, but Meredith nods. "I am," she says. It's strange even now to say that and mean it when she spent so long not wanting it, resisting, but it's true all the same, and she's oddly thankful for that. They've had enough of waiting for each other and something good.

[missingthekeep.livejournal.com]

Wonders never cease, Sean thinks, but he leaves the thought unvoiced as he stands there with his bride-to-be, gazing down as his daughter yawns in her crib. When things are this perfect, as perfect as waking life gets, really, what else is there left to say?