"It's not," Meredith protests, looking up again. "I want you to be happy. I want you to do what you want to do. That doesn't mean that I have to like it or I want to think about it." Whether she wants to or not, she can't help it now, seeing the results of his trying to have some facsimile of the effect, thinking how easy it would be for him to always be away from her, too.